Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Farewell

After so much thought, I've decided to quit blogging. I wasn't prepared nor did I remember how much people in small towns get involved in other peoples lives. What I thought was a great way to stay in touch with people, slowly turned into a place where people can come to spy on me and get inside information to discuss at family functions.

I now understand why there aren't many people who openly post on Facebook here.

It makes me sad that I can't even express my thoughts without being judged by people. Worrying about what people think has once again consumed my life.

Sometimes, life isn't always about roses, candy and rainbows. I hate nothing more than fake people and people who say one thing and do another.

I'm slowly realizing who my true friends are. It's saddens me find out that those people aren't the ones I thought they were. I need to surround myself with people who make me feel good about myself and people who I can make feel good about themselves. I know that my true friends will check in from time to time and actually have a conversation with me about life.

All that matters to me is my husband, my beautiful baby boy and this little bundle on the way.

It's been fun. Unfortunately, Saskatchewan isn't ready for blogging.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

18 Weeks and Some Stakes

Can't believe it. I'm 18 weeks along today. Baby is starting to hiccup. I remember feeling Logan's hiccups every night when I laid down in bed. It sure bothered me then but I can't wait to feel it again. In two weeks, I'll be half way. CD is right, it really does fly by the second time around.

Work has been amazing. I really enjoy my time here. I'm doing well and the whole crew is super fun to work with. All radio people are 'out there' fun. They're entertainers. I've laughed more working here than I ever did with Rhino.

We're heading to Calgary after work on Thursday to sign some papers, meet with our lawyer and pack the rest of our belongings. I'm super thankful to be doing this. I think that closing this book is going to help me move on. Still having half of our stuff there keeps half my heart there. It's strange I know. I'm really looking forward to letting go and saying good-bye for real this time.

Since everything is coming to a close, we have staked out the new house at the farm. Some time this week, they will be digging the basement. I'll post pictures of that. It's a BIG step. Can't wait to spend my winter months dreaming of decor.

I'm taking a sewing class on the 22nd so that I can be busy this winter making window treatments, pillows and accessories for the new house. Those damn curtain panels are so bloody expensive! I'm pretty sure I can sew a couple straight lings with a pocket at the top. Or can I? We'll see I guess.

Friday, September 30, 2011

Comment from previous post - "You're Kidding Me Right?
D wrote:
It's really too bad... Small town Sask. is struggling to survive. On one hand, you have people moving into town who commute to other communities to work. Many don't support our local businesses, and seem to care little about the community. On the other hand, you have the core of local people who for the most part do support our local businesses and also spend countless hours and alot of money maintaining our local facilities ( community hall, rink, bowling alley, church etc. ) and keeping our clubs going. Things aren't perfect here, but we're doing our best with limited resources. You grew up in a small community, so you should know what it's like. It's easy to critisize and use excuses to not support the community. And it may make for some good reading for your friends in Calgary. But whether you like it or not, you're part of this community now by your own choice. So why don't you start acting like part of the community, and try to make things better, instead of critisizing us and making up excuses not to? Who knows, you might even learn to like it here.

Dear D,

Thanks for your comment. Since I don't know who you are, I can only assume that you know nothing about me and my life here.  You've read a snippet from my life and have judged me. I'd like to take this opportunity to explain a few things.

Firstly, I shop local and spend $50/week here. I also spend $50/week at the IGA in Humboldt and $50/week at the Extra Foods in Humboldt. I spend another $40/week at the Shoppers Drug Mart getting items that I can not get at the grocery stores. I've volunteered my time three times in three months.

My job on a daily basis is to help 'local' businesses in Humboldt find ways to keep 'local' people shopping in town and not going to Saskatoon. Helping them get people to buy their books at Between The Pages - which I do, shop at Modern Meat for their meat - which I do and purchase a new vehicle at one of the three struggling dealerships - which we have.

Now, just so we are clear. Humboldt is also a small town trying to survive from people who shop online (which I assume you do) and who drive to Saskatoon to buy items at Walmart (which I assume you also do). Don't get me wrong. I also go the Saskatoon once a month for items that I can't find here. Sleepers, diapers etc.

I have done nothing but support local since moving here. So, the next time you'd like to judge my life and what I'm going through in this very difficult transition, perhaps you could identify yourself.

You know it's funny. I left this place a month after I graduated. Want to know why? Because of people like you who jump in to other people's personal lives without being asked to, judge and then don't have the guts to say your name.

There's another thing I know for sure. This is a small place to live and there are only one D with your writing style. If you don't like what I have to say, you don't have to read it.

We all have a right to say and think the way we want so I won't take that away from you. Actually, I applaud you for challenging me. I'm sure my friends in Calgary will love to read this one. Congrats!

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

You're Kidding Me Right?

Before I go on an official rant, we're done harvest! Woop. I enjoyed a sit down meal with my husband tonight. So nice.

Commence rant.

My FIL is vice chair on the board of directors for Federated Coop. He is also something high up at the Canadian Coop. He is MR CO-OP.

There is a local grocery store here in town that is just OK. It's not clean, the produce sucks and everything is dusty. On Sunday, I tried to buy a package of bacon for BLT's only to pull out the pack dripping with meat juice. Nice.

I do most of my grocery shopping in Humboldt. I go before I pick Logan up. It's easy and there is more selection. What's the problem?

Someone saw me shopping in Humboldt and reported it to my FIL. Are you seriously kidding me?

So tonight, I got a stern talking to and was asked to kindly support the local Co-op. WHAT?

Again.....Are you f'ing kidding me? Now I can't even shop where I want to?

Since when do I do what people tell me to? I don't. I do the opposite just to piss people off.

This is going to get interesting.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Exhausta-pooped.

This is a perfect indication on how we are both feeling lately.


This is a typical drive home for us. He conks out in the back and I yawn my way home. We are so tired.

I remember how emotional I got when I was pregnant with Logan. The littlest things made me cry. Last night, I stupidly started watching baby videos and looking at 6 month old pictures. I bawled my eyes out. If you would have asked me last night, I wasn't going to work this morning. I was crying because it breaks my heart to not be there for all those moments in his life. I love him more than anything in the world and I know that daycare / working is good for both of us but why do I feel so awful?

He's only going to be young once. I have the rest of my life to work. Am I picking work over family? These were the thoughts running through my head. all. night.

I couldn't wait to hug him this morning. He is such a sugar ball lately. Big hugs and kisses when I ask. He is always happy and listens so well. I couldn't ask for a better baby. Truly. I am so blessed with this one.

It seems like when I get all irrational like this, Chris is the sane brain that calms me down. "It's only for 5 months. You can do it." Oh right. 5 months.

Winter will be here soon and I will be feeling cooped up and super thankful that I have work to escape to.

P.S. When will I get my energy back? I don't remember.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Conditionally Sold!

Booyah!!!

The county approved the special clause that our buyer put on the sale. This means that they are allowed to subdivide our property and build a second dwelling. We have two small hurdles to leap over and we are home free. A well test and a home inspection. They are going to pump water out of our well for 24 hours and then test how long it takes for the well to fill up again. No prob! With all the rain you folks have had, we're sure to pass!

We are planning on coming to Calgary to move the rest of our stuff on October 8th! See a lil Flames game vs Pittsburgh, visit with some friends, do a little shopping. Can't wait!

Harvest is going so well that we are almost half way done! The weather has been so flippin hot, the guys can go all night. Normally, they would have to stop around 10 or 11 PM because the dew would make the crop damp and then it would be hard to combine. Not when it's 31 for a week straight.

This is great news. This means that we are definitely going to start our house this fall. I'm so excited to hear this news. I've been busy looking into contractors and lumber suppliers. We are finalizing our plans (for the 3rd time) and are ready.

I'm giddy with excitement.

Here is a quick preview of the new look of the house. We had to change some things because the contractors around here were panicking a little. Sheesh. Give me a break.

I'm thinking a vanilla colored siding with cedar shakes and a red front door. Non?



Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Farming Update

So this blog is supposed to be about 'High Heels to Tractor Wheels' and well - let's face it. It's been more High Heels than Tractor Wheels lately.

Since I've started back to work full time, I haven't been blessed with as much tractor time as I would have liked. I love being out there. My dad encouraged it. Chris's sisters wanted nothing to do with the farm. They think it's weird that I even know about combine spreaders and swath adjustments. I get the sideways glance when I even comment on such things.

They started combining and are doing so great. They are working from 730AM - midnight and later. I took my second meal out to the field yesterday. It is SUCH a hasselhoff. I'm NOT a fan. Can't wait until we are living at the farm and then the guys can just come and eat at our kitchen table.

As 'romantic' as eating on the back of a truck in the middle of a dusty field sounds. The flies, dishes, hassle, lack warm food and lack of time really makes the afternoon of slaving in the kitchen worth while. Blah.

I'm not complaining. Wait, yes I am. I know it's only for 2 weeks. Then it's over and so is farming for the year. Can't wait to see my husband for more than 2 hours a day.

I must post pictures soon. I have to remember to take my camera out there next time. Here is the picture that won Chris all kinds of awards. It pretty much sums up this time of year.